Coping with Autism

Today, Nathan's private speech therapist finished her annual evaluation of him. On the evaluation scale, the bottom range of normal is 85. Nathan scored a 72! This is a far cry from two years ago when they couldn't even complete the test because he wouldn't respond. Maybe in a year, he'll be doing so well they'll discharge him from Speech therapy!

Peter requested "smashmallers" today. He meant marshmallows and I was so happy he had messed the word up. I know it sounds strange but when a four-year old makes up a word to describe something he's heard before it's so. . .normal(!) It's just another sign that his brain is out of mimic mode and is processing information in a more normal fashion. "Smashmallers" is just another reason to give me hope.

Nathan is beginning to make intelligible sounds that come close to approximating the words he is trying to use. Between yesterday and today, Nathan has said the words: blue, red, car, house, cup and paint. I could actually tell that these were words he was trying to say. We're making progress!

For the first time, Peter's speech therapist heard him use a full sentence with the first person pronoun. ("I want to play with the ball more.") He's done that at home but I would say only 5 percent of the time. The rest of the time he uses questions to prompt the listener into doing what he wants which he then answers. As in: Peter: Do you need more help? Peter: Okay. Mommy: Peter, do you need help? Peter: Okay. Mommy: Peter, can you say, "I need help, please"? Peter: Yes, please, I need help. As I've mentioned before, Peter tends to incorporate new behaviors a little more each day until he's doing something almost 100 percent. I hope in a year we'll be able to look back and see that the third person questions are a thing of the past.

This morning, while waiting for my husband to come home after dropping our daughter off at school, I was horsing around with Peter. My parents bought the boys a little toy that, when a button is pushed, multi-colored lights spin around on the inside of a clear ball. When the button is pushed the little toy vibrates a little as well. I was using the silly thing to tickle Peter. I kept putting it against his neck and he would say "tickle, tickle" and then laugh. After about a minute, he giggled and then said, "I love tickling, I love tickling, I love tickling!" We've been trying to get him to use complete sentences and for him to spontaneously say this without prompting has made my week!

I pick Peter up from school at 12:50 p.m. and he goes three days a week. Nathan goes only two times a week for two hours a day so I had already picked him up by 11:00 a.m. this morning. I put in one of their "Signing Time" videos in the car's DVD player (fantastic video series, BTW) while driving to pick up Peter. At the end of this particular video, the host, Rachel, goes over the alphabet in sign language. Nathan, yes-- my virtually non-verbal youngest, said and signed all the up through the letter G. I was so excited I actually started to cry. But driving and crying don't mix very well so I had to content myself with squealing, laughing and telling Nathan how proud I was of him.

Nathan is on the verge of talking. I say this because he is starting to use words or parts of words to express himself as opposed to just yelling or squealing. It's very limited speech-- "tha" for "that" or "no" or "tea" (to describe what I had in my hand) but I'm so excited, I can't wait to see what he will do next! Nathan is the baby and you can tell quite quickly that he knows it. I don't know how he knows but he does. Part of the reason I knew something was wrong originally was because he wasn't maturing as quickly as he should have (both developmentally and emotionally) and I was getting frustrated with how baby-like he was acting when he should have been acting more like a toddler. I find it strangely funny that the more I want him to act his age the more he acts like the spoiled one. So I can't force him to act his age, I can only encourage it in as many situations as possible. Don't get me wrong, Nathan is an a...

I think one of the most frustrating aspects of dealing with autism is the poor communication or speech skills of children diagnosed with the condition. Peter's speech is consistent with a child somewhere between one and two-years old. Nathan rarely speaks at all. Most days we do okay. Peter will come up and tell me something using just a word or short phrase and it is often enough for me to figure out what I need to ask him in order to get more information. But even this gets to be nearly an impossible task when he is tired or mad-- he has a harder time concentrating on the words which just serves to make him angry. Nathan communicates primarily using sign language although he is starting to name objects more frequently than he has in the past. He is pointing at cars (real ones and toys) saying "car." Today, he dropped something and said "Oh, no!"-- something I think he gets from me. Nathan's hearing was recently tested because we are trying to rule out any ...

Peter actually told me he had to go "potty" today. Again, this is a big deal-- so far I've had to ask him, he hasn't initiated anything. We're making progress but this is often how Peter does things. Once he achieves a level of confidence in something he doesn't look back. We are very fortunate that he doesn't regress or hasn't shown any tendency to do so. Our biggest struggle so far (and there have been many) seems to be with his allergies. He has the stereotypical autistic look (frail upper body, often dark circles under the eyes, etc.) and the wretched laundry list of allergies. So far, Peter is allergic to soy, beef, potatoes, birch, oak, walnut, grass, dustmites, cats, dogs and. . . I'm forgetting something. Nathan tried to say "fish" again yesterday and if you haven't already guessed, we have a fish and two cats -- and yeah, I know, with Peter's allergies, etc., but the cats are getting old so we won't be replacing them ...

I'm not sure where this is coming from but Peter is coming up to me, looking me in the eyes and trying to wink. It's terribly funny. He screws up one eye and then the other and then watches while I wink at him. Nathan doesn't feel well today but he was showing off on Friday. He used about five words he had never used before (of course this is the one who rarely, if ever, says anything verbally) and he surprised both me and his teacher. Now, if we could just get a repeat performance :)